I had been waiting for the taxi that would drive me from work to college for 15 minutes now. I was restless. He arrived any later, and I would miss my midterm test. I couldn’t miss my test! My sister’s car was being fixed; it would not be ready until after 30 minutes. I called the taxi company a million times, but the taxi never arrived. I resigned myself to wait… against my will. When I was finally able to make it to school, I found out that my teacher had not yet made it to class.
Recently, I once again wasn’t able to make it to one of my finals due to job responsibilities and other misunderstandings. I paid to retake the test and, after 5 days, my teacher had not yet graded it. I feared that I wouldn’t be able to enroll in the next semester. The last day of course registration, with hopes deflated, I found out that she had finally sent in my grade, and I was able to take my courses normally. By the way, I got an A!
These are only a few stories that represent what my year has mostly looked like. It’s easy to worry when we find ourselves in times of anxiety or uncertainty. When we’ve exhausted every possible solution, worrying makes us feel like we still have some control over the situation. But in reality, we don’t. Worrying won’t change the situation, it will only encourage us to dwell in the difficulties or trouble.
In both situations above, the problem was out of my hands. I did everything within my possibility to fix things, but I couldn’t. Since God knows I like to be in control, He intentionally closed those doors, He made me wait until the very last minute to show me that my problems are in His hands and that worry wouldn’t change my situation.
When we worry, we forget that everything that happens in our lives has not escaped God’s knowledge. We are deceiving ourselves into thinking that we have any say over the final outcome of things. We can do everything right and still, things might not go as planned. And thank God for detours, because they take our eyes from our own self-sufficiency and force us to rely in Him alone.
As we start a new year, we reflect on what we’ve accomplished so far and the goals we hope to attain in the near future. I can say that many things I hoped would happen in 2011 didn’t happen. And as the new year starts peeking in, my mind tends to wander if I’ll “make them happen” in 2012.
Whatever you and I weren’t able to do in 2011, whatever we don’t get to accomplish in 2012, whatever trouble comes our way, whatever way God decides to solve it, whatever happens, there’s no use in worrying… not now, not ever.
Happy New Year!